Hey There Beraskentjoeria.
If you really knew me, you’d know that I want to be with him so bad. I have real feelings for him. I want to be with him. Hold him, kiss him, hug him, cheer him on at his LAX games and say “Yeah, you see that one? He’s mine.” But I can’t. I can’t tell you how I feel. If I get hurt again, I don’t know how much longer I can last.
If You really knew me, you’d know that I hide inside myself everyday. You’d know that I never EVER show my true self to anyone at all. And If You REALLY knew me you’d know that I am so afraid of what people think about me, it eats me alive.
You would know I miss you and how everything used to be. I only trust a few people in my life, and I still refuse too even let them know how much I miss you.
I feel fat, idk if i am really fat or not. but i feel fat. I just want to be bones. i try and work my way out to be that, but i can never look perfect. I feel ugly. more than i should. Am i ruining myself that way?